Alvis Tries To Fit In

Alvis has tried with some success to fit in in the big city. However, his employment history has been somewhat spotty, with six jobs in the last two years. He is afraid that potential employers will think he is a job hopper, and says he has never left a job voluntarily in his life. His most recent job was as a Salvation Army bellringer. Alvis said the job only paid minimum wage, but the tips were great. Unfortunately, they did not keep him on for a second day. Alvis also tried to go to a cooking school, but was quickly expelled without an explanation. He says the experience left a bad taste in his mouth.

Alvis exercises regularly, having learned the habit from his Granny Gogwecker, who when she was his age, began walking 5 miles a day every day. Today, they don't know where the hell she is. It seems she and Grampa Gogwecker never got along very well. Alvis claims he is self made, starting out with nothing and having most of it left.