Another Letter From Mama
Dear Alvis:
Things are much the same here in Hootin Holler. The economy is so bad here, that when your father recently took a load of trash to the dump, he came back with more than he took.
Your Great Aunt Elsie Gogwecker is now calling herself a sexy senior citizen. Seems she just won a wet shawl contest. Makes you wonder where she got the money she gave you for your birthday.
Nacho Gack told me that he was going to become a vegetarian. Your father said vegetarian was an old, old word for “lousy hunter”. You know, we have always suspected that Nacho was a bit light fingered. Our suspicions were confirmed the other day. At school for “Show and Tell,” his kids took a siphon hose. Last year when he went to Florida on vacation, Nacho got thrown out of Sea World when they caught him with his fishing pole.
Little Johnny Clinton is now going to school. My, my it seems like just yesterday he was learning to walk and falling into the holler. But I digress. The other day, Johnny’s teacher was reading his class the story of the Three Little Pigs. When she came to the part where the first little pig went to the farmer and said, “Can I have some straw to build my house?”, she asked the class what they thought the farmer said. Johnny raised his hand and said, “I bet the farmer said, “Holy Cow, a talking pig!”
Lazlo Thomas was recently offered a job. Of course, he has never worked a day in his life, so he turned it down. He says hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. Lazlo always seems to be available for work after it is done.
Your father and I are glad that the elections are over. So many speeches and claims. Your father says it doesn’t seem matter what a politician does. It only matters what he says he’s done and what he says he is going to do.
Well must close for now. I am worried. Everything seems to be going well, so I think I may have overlooked something.
Love,
Mama
Things are much the same here in Hootin Holler. The economy is so bad here, that when your father recently took a load of trash to the dump, he came back with more than he took.
Your Great Aunt Elsie Gogwecker is now calling herself a sexy senior citizen. Seems she just won a wet shawl contest. Makes you wonder where she got the money she gave you for your birthday.
Nacho Gack told me that he was going to become a vegetarian. Your father said vegetarian was an old, old word for “lousy hunter”. You know, we have always suspected that Nacho was a bit light fingered. Our suspicions were confirmed the other day. At school for “Show and Tell,” his kids took a siphon hose. Last year when he went to Florida on vacation, Nacho got thrown out of Sea World when they caught him with his fishing pole.
Little Johnny Clinton is now going to school. My, my it seems like just yesterday he was learning to walk and falling into the holler. But I digress. The other day, Johnny’s teacher was reading his class the story of the Three Little Pigs. When she came to the part where the first little pig went to the farmer and said, “Can I have some straw to build my house?”, she asked the class what they thought the farmer said. Johnny raised his hand and said, “I bet the farmer said, “Holy Cow, a talking pig!”
Lazlo Thomas was recently offered a job. Of course, he has never worked a day in his life, so he turned it down. He says hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. Lazlo always seems to be available for work after it is done.
Your father and I are glad that the elections are over. So many speeches and claims. Your father says it doesn’t seem matter what a politician does. It only matters what he says he’s done and what he says he is going to do.
Well must close for now. I am worried. Everything seems to be going well, so I think I may have overlooked something.
Love,
Mama
posted by The Joker at 10:44 PM
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