A New Letter From Mama
Dear Alvis:
Things are much the same here in Hootin Holler. Your father and I are feeling pretty good for our age, but we realized that one of the signs we are getting older is that we are getting up at the same time we used to go to bed.
Birdie Brain returned from visiting her sister in the city. She told me her sister took her to a fancy French restaurant for dinner and ordered Escargot. Birdie said her sister told her Escargot was French for snails. Well, Birdie tried them and said she did not like them that much. She prefers fast food.
Bill Glotz recently went to the doctor because of a pain in his belly. The doctor told Bill that he needed an operation. When Bill found out what it would cost, he told the doctor he couldn’t afford it, so the doctor offered to touch up his x-rays. Bill did have the surgery and is doing fine. Says when he woke up the curtains in his room were closed tightly. When he asked why, the doctor told him there was a big fire across the street and they did not want to scare him.
Harley Corn quit going to therapy. I think he is a bit paranoid. Says his doctor was trying to help him behind his back. Then his twin brother forgot his birthday. Harley said he felt so bad, he called the Suicide Prevention Hotline. And they put him on hold.
Lazlo Thomas is still as lazy as they come. Recently, he turned down a job that required him to be pretty active. Says that if he wanted to feel athletic, he would go to a sports bar. He told your father that he never reads the fine print in anything, cause there is no way he is going to like it.
Betty Clam came to visit yesterday. She is still a big gossip, telling all sorts of funny tales about everybody. Your father says she has a great sense of rumor.
Arnold Bullwinkle and his wife, Dottie, went shopping in the city last weekend. Arnold says they were in this big department store, when they got separated, and he could not find Dottie. So Arnold found a pretty woman in the store and started to talk to her. Arnold says that whenever he does that his wife appears out of nowhere. And she did!
Well, got to go help your father. He tasted a mushroom from our back yard to see if it was safe to eat. Got to take him to the hospital to get his stomach pumped.
Love,
Mama
Things are much the same here in Hootin Holler. Your father and I are feeling pretty good for our age, but we realized that one of the signs we are getting older is that we are getting up at the same time we used to go to bed.
Birdie Brain returned from visiting her sister in the city. She told me her sister took her to a fancy French restaurant for dinner and ordered Escargot. Birdie said her sister told her Escargot was French for snails. Well, Birdie tried them and said she did not like them that much. She prefers fast food.
Bill Glotz recently went to the doctor because of a pain in his belly. The doctor told Bill that he needed an operation. When Bill found out what it would cost, he told the doctor he couldn’t afford it, so the doctor offered to touch up his x-rays. Bill did have the surgery and is doing fine. Says when he woke up the curtains in his room were closed tightly. When he asked why, the doctor told him there was a big fire across the street and they did not want to scare him.
Harley Corn quit going to therapy. I think he is a bit paranoid. Says his doctor was trying to help him behind his back. Then his twin brother forgot his birthday. Harley said he felt so bad, he called the Suicide Prevention Hotline. And they put him on hold.
Lazlo Thomas is still as lazy as they come. Recently, he turned down a job that required him to be pretty active. Says that if he wanted to feel athletic, he would go to a sports bar. He told your father that he never reads the fine print in anything, cause there is no way he is going to like it.
Betty Clam came to visit yesterday. She is still a big gossip, telling all sorts of funny tales about everybody. Your father says she has a great sense of rumor.
Arnold Bullwinkle and his wife, Dottie, went shopping in the city last weekend. Arnold says they were in this big department store, when they got separated, and he could not find Dottie. So Arnold found a pretty woman in the store and started to talk to her. Arnold says that whenever he does that his wife appears out of nowhere. And she did!
Well, got to go help your father. He tasted a mushroom from our back yard to see if it was safe to eat. Got to take him to the hospital to get his stomach pumped.
Love,
Mama
posted by The Joker at 9:12 AM
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