Mama Writes

Dear Alvis:

Things are much the same here in Hootin Holler. Your father and I are getting older and beginning to feel that way. He says two signs of advancing age are when everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work.

Speaking of getting older, you’ll probably remember Rudy Gape recently got married right after his 89th birthday to Orpa Glow, a 85 year old widow. It was Rudy’s first marriage. It is a shame that just when Rudy decided to get married and make the most out of life, most of his is gone. Rudy says there are many, many advantages to old age, but he can’t remember what they are. He told your father that if he were a redwood tree, he wouldn’t even be through puberty yet. Rudy said one of the advantages of getting married at such an advanced age was that Medicare picked up 50% of the cost of their honeymoon. Your father says that Rudy has been able to combine the wisdom of youth with the energy of old age.

Harley Corn went to see his psychiatrist again last week. He says he used to be indecisive, but now he is not so sure. Harley has decided to be more positive about life. He says it doesn’t make sense to be pessimistic because it wouldn’t work out anyway.

Betty Clam came to visit yesterday. She is still a big gossip. She says everything she tells me is in confidence because that is the way it was told to her.

Well, must go and help your father. He was testing a swing in Hootin Holler Park to see if the ropes needed to be replaced. They did.

Love,
Mama